Christmas Confessions
by R.C. Cummings
Summary: Emily is tired of everyone assuming her life and sets out to express her true self.


**Those waiting on my series please be patient. I promise in the next two weeks I will have a posting up. I am halfway through the next section.**

 **I have had so many distractions with my father's health declining and details surrounding everything. I have written this Christmas piece because I love the atmosphere of that time of year and needed a happy place.**

 **I love family but not all the judgments sometimes… especially when they have no clue of one's heart.**

 ***Okay as always I own nothing of Criminal minds I just get the privilege of playing with the characters for a while.**

Chapter One

The team was going to fly back from Northern California after solving a case, but had to spend an extra day due to jet issues. Making use of the extra time they went Christmas shopping since it was only two weeks away. All except Emily and Reid who met an old friend of hers from England at their distillery that he and his wife ran. Otto had promised Emily a tour for some time and she decided now was as good of time as any.

"So Emily your mother is up to her old tricks again I hear love," Otto said with a grin.

"Yes I have been ordered to the castle for the Christmas ball much to my sure grin. "

"Has the fairy godmother granted your wish yet?" He asked laughing.

"I am waiting on a reply from India on that." She said with a smug and almost evil smile.

"In that case I will be sending out a couple of bottles of our Sloe Gin since it is the Princess from the East's favorite."

"Thank you that would be most appreciated."

"I'm just sorry I will not get to see the Hydras face when she shows up."

"Otto... She is still my mother even though she does have the ability to freeze people to stone with her eyes." She said as they both laughed.

"Em…we need to get back if we are going to catch the jet." Reid said looking at his watch nervously.

"It's oaky Wonder Boy…we'll get there. I'm driving." She said smiling at him.

"Em…you have consumed a lot of alcohol on this tour that isn't a good idea." Reid said looking worriedly at her.

"I'm fine." She said tripping over Otto's feet and laughed as she stumbled.

"No… you are not."

"You are no better Spencer." She said pointing at his jacket.

"What are you talking about?"

"You buttoned up your jacket wrong…so I guess I'm driving then."

"Oh no you don't I'll have Celia drive my car and I'll driver yours back. Friends don't let friends drive buzzed and Clark you are defiantly buzzed." Otto said laughing at Emily who couldn't even respond because she was laughing so hard at the puzzled look on Spencer's face trying to button his jacket right.

"Come on genius." She said after fixing his jacket and walking him to the SUV.

"Em…who's Clark"

"Never mind Spencer it's a long story and one I'm not so sure your old enough to hear." She said as they got into the SUV that they had driven out in.

XXXXX

"Well… look who the prairie dogs have done gone and drug in." Morgan said laughing at Reid and Emily who were singing Jingle Bells to the top of their lungs as they got out.

"They are all yours now. Good luck." Otto said to Morgan who took Reid and got him on the jet.

"Emily behave yourself or not."

"I love you Otto…be good to that lady of yours." She said pointing to the woman who drove them to the airstrip.

"I will and say hello to the Indian Princess and even to the Hydra." He said hugging her as they laughed.

Morgan came and got their go bags trying to hurry the process along. "Dad's not pleased we are ten minutes late leaving."

"On my way Morgan," she said hitting him on the butt as he went by freaking the man out. They got to their seats just in time to fasten up and take off. Spencer and Emily were still humming Jingle Bells and would crack up laughing if they caught each other's eyes. JJ was sitting beside Emily while Pen was sitting beside Morgan.

Spencer was across the aisle. "It sounds like you two had fun today." JJ said smiling at the two nerds who normally were the designated drivers for everyone else.

"We went to Emily's friend's distillery. It was amazing to watch how they made everything. They specialized in whiskey and sole gin." Reid said excitedly.

"And just how many whiskies did you taste?" Morgan asked the young genius.

"About as many as Emily did but she also tasted the Sloe Gin…and I think she is a little more intoxicated than I am."

"That is totally untrue Wonder Boy."

"Em…that's Boy Wonder," Pen corrected.

"Not in this case… trust me," she said remembering having to fix the buttons on the man's jacket.

"Okay you two…we will let you have your secrets. Now on a whole other subject, Emily your mother's ball is coming up and everyone has a date but…"

"Don't start Pen…" She said in a warning tone.

"Em…I think Pen was just making sure you were set for your mom's thing." JJ said trying to intervene on her best friend's behalf.

"No what she and you are planning on doing is trying to set me up with some bozo that is not my type." She said glaring at JJ.

"Look Adam in legal has been asking for your number for years or even Manning from Tom's team is in town during…"

Emily's phone made a noise indicating a text was being received. She looked at it before tearing into the two busy bodies. "Yes… Ladies you have nothing to worry about. That was the confirmation on my date for my mother's ball."

"Yea…right" Pen said laughing.

"Pen…" JJ scolded.

"Yes Pen… I have you know I have a date and Smitty has the right chromosome and everything that I like."

"You mean the Y chromosome don't you?" Morgan asked smiling.

She said nothing but gave him a wicked smile and went to the back of the jet and curled up in a ball and fell asleep leaving the others wondering about her mystery date.

"Who do you think this mystery date is?" Pen asked JJ.

"I'm not sure Pen…I've never heard her talk about a Smitty before."

"What kind of name is that any way?"

"She has been acting weird since finding that girl hanging in her bedroom two days ago." Morgan said joining the conversation.

"Reid…" Pen got his attention from the book he was reading.

"What's up?"

"How was Emily today?"

"She was Emily."

"We know that genius. But did she act differently?" Morgan asked frustrated.

"She let loose a bit after tasting some of the whiskies. On the end of the tour her friend asked about the Christmas ball and if the fairy godmother had granted her wish yet. Emily told him she was waiting on a reply back from India.

"India…She had to get a date from India? Wow…" Pen said with an amazed expression on her face.

"Reid you sure she said India?" Hotch entered the conversation.

"Yes…I'm positive."

"Okay…enough about Emily's personal life and JJ you and Garcia are to drive her home when we land. I would like one of you to stay with her but I know she will probably not allow it. We will not mention her personal life anymore is that understood?"

"Sure Hotch but what's going on?" Morgan asked what everyone else wanted to know.

"It's not for me to say…however I will say this the previous case was a hard one for her and we all know her mother is a stressor too. We do not need to be one for her as well."

"Yes sir… Garcia and I will make sure she gets home and I will try to stay but she doesn't seem in the receptive kind of mood for company." JJ said raising her eyebrow like you know what I'm saying is true.

"That's all you can do…thank you." He said as he went back to his paperwork.

"Aaron what are you really worried about?" Rossi asked knowing that there was something more to the story.

"I worked with her mother for several years and I know that she always has an underlying motive and for her to invite the B.A.U. means she plans on stressing Emily beyond her means knowing her daughter will not act out in front of us. But I'm afraid that the stress of the event coupled with the stress of this previous case will cause Emily to act out even though we are there especially if her date is who I think it is."

"Who is this man from India?"

"Just wait and see Dave is all I can say. We may all be in for some surprises."

"With Emily…I expect nothing less considering all those pent up emotions. They have to go somewhere."

"Trust me they do and it's normally not where the Ambassador likes them to." Hotch said as he looked at the sleeping brunette hoping she knew what she was doing by taking Smitty as her date.

"I bet they don't." He said laughing thinking this Christmas could get interesting after all.

Chapter Two

JJ came into Pen's lair being summoned by the Queen of All Knowledge's request.

"What can I do for you Pen?"

"Did you get anything out of Emily after I left?"

"You know I didn't. I barely got a thank you before the door shut. She was in a really bad mood. I just hope she gets out of it before Friday." She said rolling her eyes.

"I know what you mean. I just wonder what has twisted her britches. She has had hard cases before but this one got to her."

"True but she was the one who interviewed the girl and I know she almost begged Hotch not to turn her back over to her family. Then she was the one that found her hanging."

"Do you know what they talked about?"

"No…the girl would only talk to her. How about you? Have you found out anything on this Smitty?"

"JJ I'm shocked you would even ask after Hotch said to leave it alone."

JJ looked at her like really, "What have you found?"

"Absolutely nothing…Darn it." They both busted out laughing.

"Guess we will meet him on Friday then." She said as she left to go to her office.

XXXXX

The team came together in the conference room Friday morning for a briefing on the holiday schedule.

"Listen up…We have the ambassador's ball tonight. We return Monday and Tuesday then we are off till Monday the 29th when we are on call again… questions anyone?" Hotch asked looking around the table.

"Good then back to the paperwork on your desk until 4pm. I expect you all at the Ambassador's house by 7 pm at the latest." He said as he took his files and left the room as his form of dismissal.

"So…" Garcia just couldn't take the anticipation anymore, "Em…Has your date arrived yet?"

"What do you mean arrived yet?"

"Oh…Reid told us he was coming from India."

"Reid," she asked puzzled.

"Yeah…he said you told your friend from England last week that your date was coming from India."

"Oh…he did…did he?"

"Pen… Don't go getting Spence in trouble with Emily." JJ said giving her a look of "you know we aren't supposed to be bringing this up." He just mentioned you might have a friend from India coming to your mother's ball tonight."

"Well yes to both of those questions then. Smitty will be dropped off here at 3:30pm and we will meet you all at my mother's at 7pm." She said picking up her stuff and leaving with a half grin on her face knowing she was driving her friends crazy with the secrecy of her date.

"That woman is incorrigible." Pen said stomping her foot.

"It will be okay Pen we only have six more hours to meet Mr. India."

"You know you are just as curious as I am."

"I am…I admit it but she is being all Emily." She said waving her hand in surrender.

XXXXX

The team worked with one eye on their files while the other was on the clock or watching Emily who seemed oblivious to them. She actually seemed to be getting into the Christmas spirit which unnerved them somewhat. JJ, Pen, Morgan and Reid met at the coffee pot at 3:20 pm while Emily took her purse and went to the restroom. "Did you hear her?" Morgan asked Reid. "She was singing Christmas songs. Scrooge was actually singing."

"She has sung Christmas carols before…just last week even. We sung them on the way back to the jet."

"Yea…but you two were lit." He said smiling at the genius.

"Be quiet here she comes." JJ said warning them of her return.

The glass door to the B.A.U swung open before she made it over to the others.

"Clark!" A beautiful tan woman with long jet black hair wearing a tight red dress yelled.

"Smitty" Emily said basically running up to the woman and caught her in a tight hug. Pulling away the woman looked at her and smiled a big smile capturing Emily's lips in a searing kiss. Breaking apart when Rossi walked up and cleared his throat behind them, "Agent Rossi I would like you to meet a very good friend of mine Smitakshi Brahmbhatt." Emily said smiling.

"Please just call me Smitty." The beautiful woman said extending her hand to shake the man's before her.

"I shall and you can call me Dave." He said looking over towards the break room, "Emily…I never thought it was possible but you have made the stooges speechless," nodding towards the group starring at the women in front of the coffee pot with their mouths open.

Smitty came up in Emily's personal space and pecked her lips, "Have you been keeping me a secret again love?"

"How could I keep all of this a secret?" She said stepping back looking at the woman with a predatory grin. "Let's get out of here so you can rest a bit before mother's ball."

"Let's go but I'm not tired maybe we could find another activity to occupy our time till then." She said and gave a sultry look towards Emily.

"Hummm… maybe," she said as she picked up her go bag placed it on top of Smitty's rolling luggage and left with the team watching frozen to the floor of the break room. They finally came out and stood by Rossi as Hotch approached the group and asked, "What did I miss?"

"Emily's date," Rossi said.

"Well by the looks on your faces it was Smitakshi Brahmbhatt."

"Yes it was," he said smiling.

"Hotch did you know?" Pen asked looking at the man shocked.

"Did I know that Emily's date was a female or that Emily only dates women?"

They all looked at him and said in unison, "both."

"Yes I did."

"…and you didn't tell us?"

"Morgan I believe if she wanted anyone to know she would have shared that information. My only concern in that area should be if she was attracted to anyone on this team… otherwise it is her business with whom she sleeps with."

"Well…I believe she is certainly relaying that information now." JJ said with an edge to her voice.

"Is there an issue JJ?" He turned asking the woman firmly.

"No issue…just surprised is all." She said in a softer tone gathering her emotions inside her.

"Good…Now I suggest we all leave and get ready for tonight." He said pointedly.

"Sure…we'll see you later Hotch. Reid said gathering his things quickly as the others did as well.

"JJ can I speak with you before you go," he asked giving her a look of "there isn't a "no" option to this request."

"Sure Hotch…let me go and get my stuff and I will meet you in your office in ten."

He shook his head in agreement as he headed back to his office.

XXXXX

She knocked on the door after taking a deep breath, "You wanted to speak with me?"

"Yes…come in and have a seat."

"Crap…it's a have a seat thing," she thought to herself.

"I realize that there have been some surprising revelations about Emily's personal life lately…"

"I'm okay with it Hotch." She interrupted him hoping to expedite the conversation if she could.

"I'm glad to hear that because I need you to keep an eye on her during tonight's event."

"Damn!" she said in her head. "Sure… what am I watching for?"

"Smitty is not Emily's normal attraction but they are very close and the woman brings out the scandalous in Emily. I need you to run interference should you see any of this behavior happening."

"What do you mean Smitty isn't her normal attraction?"

"She normally dates blondes with blue eyes from what I was told when I worked for the family.

Her first love fit that description. The woman ended up killing herself after her father insisted on trying to rehabilitate her to liking men. It devastated Emily and the Ambassador has also tried to persuade her daughter to date men as well." He paused letting the information register with her, "Then Emily met Smitty in college and it helped her with her sexuality but her mother gave her an ultimatum so Emily hasn't been openly gay since then."

"Until this afternoon that is," JJ said to herself more than to him.

"Yes…until this afternoon. Something happened on our last case that has triggered all of this and she hasn't opened up to anyone about it."

"So you think because I'm blonde and blue eyed she will open up to me?" JJ asked looking at him like "really."

"No… I believe she will stay in control around you because she has feelings for you."

JJ's eyes went wide, "What?"

"Emily hides her feelings very well but she is attracted to you. It doesn't take a profiler to see that. I've had to answer too many questions about your friendship."

"Hotch…we are friends. That is all." She protested sternly trying to cover up the feeling of being exposed.

"I see… just know I'm here for you both if anything happens. Meaning…if you become uncomfortable or things become clearer."

"Hotch…I have a boyfriend." She said trying to deflect the issue once again.

"Okay… Then just help keep our fellow team member and friend from doing something crazy tonight if possible."

"I will try." She said as she got up to escape his stare and hopefully her own feelings. She had always felt an attraction to Emily herself but fought it just like she fought the attraction to the women in college.

She headed to her car as her phone rang, "Hey Pen…What's up?"

"What did Hotch want?"

"He just wants me to keep an eye on Emily tonight so she doesn't make a fool of herself."

"Oh…I believe our brooding princess is determined to express herself right now. Can you believe that goddess she was kissing…oh my god."

"I know Pen. Look I'm just leaving to go and get ready for tonight can we chat later?"

"Sure buttercup…is everything okay?"

"Yeah…no…Pen can I ask you something and it stay between us?"

"Sure"

"Have you ever thought Emily was attracted to me?"

"What?"

"Never mind"

"JJ… You and Emily flirt with each other all the time. I always thought you two would make a great couple if you both would wake up and smell the coffee."

"Pen…I have a boyfriend."

"Yes…that lives hundreds of miles away and who you didn't want us to know about until Emily pushed you to acknowledge him."

"If you are right and apparently she is gay…why would she push me towards him?"

"Because maybe she is a really good friend and put your feelings before her own and maybe she thought it would be easier job wise. Remember the whole fraternization policy thing."

"Yeah…maybe your right"

"Why all the questions"

"It was just a big shock today."

"Right…"

"Don't start Pen."

"What?"

"I know that tone."

"What tone?"

"The one where you think you know something before someone else does."

"…and I'm usually right…aren't I?"

"Not in this case. I'll see you later."

"Okay… Miss in denial…later." She hung up before JJ could rebuttal her comment.

"Great this is going to be an amazing evening," she thought to herself as she took a deep breath and started the car.

Chapter Three

Emily and Smitty showed up right at 7pm. JJ watched as they entered and looked to see if the Ambassador noticed their entrance as well. She was surprised that it didn't seem to faze the woman by all appearances but Emily was a lot like her mother with the unreadable expressions. JJ did noticed subtle changes like the stiffing of the back and the slight gritting of the jaw but other than that no one would have noticed any changes in her mother's expressions. She watched as the Ambassador came up to Emily who was wearing a tailored navy blue tuxedo with a red bow tie that matched her date's low cut red evening gown. JJ moved closer so she could watch the interchange between mother and daughter.

"Emily so glad you could make it dear."

"Mother you remember Smitty?" She said making her mother acknowledge her date.

"Why yes I do. Hello Miss Brahmbhatt and thank you for attending my ball. I believe your parents are already here somewhere."

"Thank you Ambassador," The woman said and curtsied.

"Wow…this is really going to get interesting, and damn Emily looks good in that tux." JJ thought, "Wait where did that come from." She shook the thought off as she heard the Ambassador ask to speak with Emily in the kitchen.

"Mother I would love too but I am not going to fight with you tonight. We are here to enjoy the Christmas cheer and I promise only the most respect for you and your guest." Emily said with a look of "I'm not backing down."

Her mother got an almost murderous look in her eye, "As you wish Emily but I will hold you to your word of respect."

"Yes ma'am." She said as her mother almost stomped off.

"Wow Clark you really did become Superman just then. You scaled that building in a single bound." Smitty said as they laughed and continued into the ballroom.

"The woman calls Emily… Clark Kent as in Superman… Wow…she must be something in bed." Pen said laughing and startling JJ.

"Pen…when did you get here?"

"I made it in time to hear Emily stand up to her mother. Where's Will?"

"He's over there talking to Morgan and Hotch."

"Where's Kevin?"

"He's over there getting us a drink."

"Oh…"

"Emily and Smitty are stunning together. You think that tux Emily is wearing is Italian?"

"Yes…Penelope that is an Italian designer suit if ever I saw one." Rossi said as he came over to greet the two women. "She wears it well."

"My you look handsome in your tux there Rossi." JJ said trying to once again take the focus off of Emily and her date.

"Why thank you and might I say you both look stunning this evening."

"Thank you." They said smiling at the older gentleman.

"Wow… did you see that dame that was kissing Emily out on the dance floor?" Kevin asked as he came up to give Pen her drink.

"Crap…" JJ said on the inside. "Rossi my boyfriend doesn't know how to dance to these waltzes properly will you dance with me?" She asked and gave him a look of please.

He looked at the two women dancing then at JJ, "I would be honored." He said and took her hand as they made their way over to Emily and Smitty."

She figured he had gotten the message as well to run interference because he excused himself shortly after starting to waltz and tapped Emily on the shoulder asking to switch partners. JJ was between a rock and a hard place now. She was glad the kissing had stopped so the Ambassador wouldn't be upset but now she was left with no other choice but to dance with Emily. The brunette looked just as distraught at the circumstances but gathered JJ into her arms and started leading her around the floor.

"Nice tux." JJ said trying to deflate some of the tension.

"Thank you. You look lovely as well." Emily said as she smiled and relaxed some.

"Your date is very pretty."

"Smitty…yeah she is beautiful."

JJ was getting frustrated trying to get Emily to talk but luckily the waltz ended. "Do you want to get a drink?" She asked wanting to get off the dance floor before another one started.

"I should..." Emily started to say until she saw Rossi taking her date to meet the team. "Well I was going to say get back to my date but I believe the Italian stud has taken over for the moment."

JJ laughed, "Let's go get a drink. I'm sure he will return her shortly and if not she will come looking for you "Clark." She said with a bite to her voice on the last part.

"Ouch…was that sarcasm?" mocking feigned hurt.

"Maybe…" She said rolling her eyes. "Sorry Em…I…we are not familiar with this side of you."

"What…the happy me with a date"

"Well…yes actually."

"At least you are still honest with me." She said as she placed her hand in the small of JJ's back and led her towards the bar.

JJ thought about the statement for a moment and took Emily's hand that was in her back and pulled her to the open patio. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"What?"

"At least I'm still honest with you."

"JJ…after today I expect people to act differently towards me. They always have in the past when they find out that I'm attracted to women."

JJ could hear Hotch's voice in her head…" I believe she will stay in control around you because she has feelings for you." She was standing there with Emily's hand still in hers watching the words come out of the woman's lips. Lips that all of sudden she wanted to taste and feel.

"Jennifer…" was softly spoken trying to get the woman's attention but JJ lent forward and caught the lips talking in a gentle kiss.

Emily was startled but she didn't pull back. JJ took that as an invitation to deepen the kiss by running the tip of her tongue along her bottom lip requesting entrance which was granted along with a cupped hand on the back of her head pulling her closer into velvet lips as a moan escaped from one of them or both of them.

They kissed for several moments until they heard Hotch clearing his throat, "Emily…I believe your date is looking for you."

Breaking apart, "Right…" She said looking up then shaking her head and walking back into the ballroom.

"Hotch…" JJ spoke to get the retreating man's attention. He stood still and turned to her, "That wasn't Emily's fault. I kissed her…" She paused a moment realizing what she was saying. Then she looked back up at him, "I kissed her."

"I know…" He said as he went inside leaving her with her thoughts.

Chapter Four

(Monday Morning)

JJ came in early to work on some files that she had totally ignored over the weekend after the ball. She was in the process of ignoring them on her desk as well when she heard a knock on the door. "Come in Pen."

"Hey you… I didn't hear from you all weekend after the ball. You and the Willister get the groove thang on."

"No…he left for New Orleans on Saturday so he could be with his family during Christmas."

"So why didn't you call me. I wanted to gossip about Emily and the Indian goddess and speaking of…she has called out today and tomorrow. I bet she can't walk."

"Pen…" JJ almost yelled.

"What?"

"We shouldn't be talking about our co-workers personal life like that."

"Right…You are just jealous."

"What?" JJ said trying to give her best bluff of a confused look because if truth be told she was.

"You are jealous that Emily got the loving and you didn't."

"Oh… no I am truly happy for her if that's the case."

"Liar…"

"Pen…"

"I know it's eating you up. You can't hide it from the queen of all knowledge."

"I wouldn't dare too." She said rolling her eyes and lifting her hands up in an act of surrender.

"Smart woman"

"Was there something else you needed? I really have to finish these files before Hotch asks for them."

"No…I just thought you might want to go get some coffee with me."

She looked at the files then decided that coffee would help speed the process up maybe. "Sure why not." She said getting up and following Pen to the coffee pot.

"Oh my god… would you look at that bouquet of roses. I haven't ever seen that many delivered at one time." Garcia said watching the delivery man walking in with Morgan who pointed at Emily's desk.

"I told you she probably couldn't walk."

"Pen…"

"Look at those roses… come on there has to be a card."

"Pen we can't look at her card."

"Correction…you can't but I can." She said as she took out towards the flowers.

"Pen…wait…" she tried to stop her but the woman already had the envelope in her hand that wasn't sealed.

"Just the way I like it. Unsealed so there isn't any evidence I've been there." She said as she pulled the card out and a set of small keys fell out.

"Aren't those hand cuff keys?" Morgan asked smiling.

Pen laughed and read.

 _"Clark…The roses are for the weekend. I started to keep the keys as a souvenir but thought you would need them if you caught a criminal. It was a blast keep in touch... Smitty."_

"Who's Clark?" Morgan asked curiously.

"Oh… My chocolate thunder you have been uprooted by Clark Kent. Emily's girl calls her Superman."

"Damn…I always thought Emily might be a tiger but Superman." Morgan said laughing.

"I thought I was clear on Emily's personal life…" was heard as they looked up and saw Hotch looking down on them, "Garcia…does that card in your hand go with the flowers on Emily's desk?"

"Yes sir." She said dejectedly.

"Then I suggest you place it back with them and let's all hit the files on our desk." He said in a firm voice that left little room for interpretation.

Pen put the card and keys back into the envelope as the others made their way to their desk. He didn't go back into his office until everyone had gotten back to their desk and Pen had left for her lair.

XXXXX

JJ just couldn't stand being closed up in her office any more with all the thoughts and emotions running around in her heart and head so lunch out sounded good. She made her way down to Pen's office around one wanting to see if the woman had lunch plans knowing she wouldn't come out of her lair after being reprimanded by Hotch. She wouldn't want him to see her out and about. Not that she could blame her. She herself was trying hard to stay out of his eye sight as well after he saw her kissing Emily. She knocked and heard a faint "Come in."

"Hey Pen…I came to see if you have lunch plans?"

"My plan JJ is to stay off of Hotch's radar after this morning."

"That's what I figured you were doing." She said laughing.

"I know Hotch is all business but why is he protecting Emily so much? It's not against F.B.I policy to be gay…so what's the big deal?"

"He worked for the family maybe he just feels he needs to protect her for history sake." JJ said trying to keep a blank face so her perceptive best friend wouldn't pick up on the fact Hotch may be trying to protect more than that or that she knew more than she was saying.

"Yeah…maybe but my sixth sense says there is more than meets the eye with this."

"Your sense always says that…now who do you want to order from since I know you are rooted in here today."

"Oh… I don't know about that. Part of me wants to go and check and see how sick Emily really is after work."

"You have a death wish don't you?" JJ said shaking her head at the laughing tech analyst.

"Hotch won't know."

"No he won't but you forget Emily will shoot you if you mess with her."

"Well there is that." Pen said pondering her next move.

"You could go with me. She wouldn't shoot you. She likes you."

"I'm going out for lunch and leave you with these words. I am straight with a boyfriend and will not aggravate a friend or disobey a direct order from Hotch."

"Scaredy-cat…"

"Pen…"

"What?"

"Take my advice and leave Emily alone."

"Well someone needs to get her flowers to her."

"I will ask Hotch about that. Maybe he will take them to her if she doesn't come in tomorrow." She said leaving before the woman could reply.

XXXXX

(Tuesday Morning)

Hotch called a meeting in the conference room causing the team to be curious if they were going to have to abandon Christmas plans yet again. When JJ came in they all looked up wondering if there was a case.

"Sorry guys I'm as lost on this one as you are." She said as she looked around and noticed that Emily had truly called out both days.

"Good morning I just wanted to gather everyone together and wish you Happy Holidays and to let you know that everyone can leave at 3pm today." Hotch said smiling a his trade mark smile.

"Yes…" Morgan said as everyone looked at him. "This means I beat the lines at the airport." They all gave him a "oh" look as they returned their attention back to Hotch. "Now let's get as many files cleared as we can before we leave today and thank you for all your hard work."

"Remember…" Rossi said before everyone could get up and leave, "… to be at my house at 6 pm for dinner on Christmas and if you are bringing good wine be there at 5 pm." They all laughed and started filing out to their desks.

"JJ can I see you in my office for a few moments?" Hotch said as he made it to the door.

She looked up, "Yes sir I'll be right there" but wanted to say "hell no that's why I dodged you all day yesterday."

Pen looked at her, "What's that all about?"

"No clue Pen but I'll call you later." She said as she picked up her tablet and coffee and made her way to Hotch's office.

"You wanted to see me?"

"Yes…come inside and shut the door please." She did as he asked. "Have a seat." He said looking up a moment from his paperwork. She sat knowing that the conversation was going to involve Emily and her kiss on Friday.

"JJ… I have left you alone these past few days realizing you may need time to work through your thoughts. I hope you have had time to even maybe speak with Emily."

She took a deep breath then looked down at her hands gathering her thoughts on how she was going to approach this.

"JJ…I am not judging you but we do need to talk about this."

"Why Hotch?" She asked looking up again. "It was just one kiss that was an impulse that didn't mean anything."

"Is that what you both believe it was?"

"I'm not sure."

"You are not sure or you haven't spoken to Emily to know what it was or how she feels?"

"The later…" She said as she brought her hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose.

"Okay… it's really no point in going further with this conversation until the both of you have talked. I suggest you take her the flowers on her desk when you leave today and have that talk. I want you both in my office on the 29th ready to discuss what needs to be discussed."

"Yes sir." She said standing up to leave. "Have you spoken to her?" She asked curiously as an afterthought.

"Yes and no."

"What does that mean?"

"You need to talk with her JJ... especially if you do have feelings for her before it's too late."

"What do you mean?"

He opened his desk draw and pulled out an envelope that had Emily's hand writing on it.

"What's that?"

"Transfer papers that I found on my desk this morning."

"Transfer papers?" she said confused.

"Yes…I called her and have scheduled a meeting at 8 am Monday to discuss these. You will also be here for that meeting so we can sort this issue out because I am not losing anyone over a kiss that may mean something or may not is that understood?"

"Yes sir."

"Good…then please leave my door open when you leave." He said as a form of dismissal.

Chapter Five

JJ pulled up at Emily's building at 5 pm. She had fought with herself all day wither to call or just show up. The later was her final choice. She waited Pen out on leaving… telling the woman that she had to finish some files. She had to even throw in a white lie saying "Hotch was taking care of Emily's flowers." She just didn't say his way of taking care of them was for her to deliver them. She walked up to the speaker and buzzed Emily's condo.

"Yes…"

"Em…its JJ I brought you some flowers that were delivered to the office yesterday."

No answer just the sound of the buzzer opening the door to the building. She got on the elevator and went up to Emily's floor and found the door ajar so she let herself in.

"Em…"

"In here."

She headed towards the voice which was coming from the kitchen. She made it to the bar and sat the roses down on it and noticed that Emily was in sweats with her back to her.

"Would you like wine or coffee?" Emily asked without turning.

"Depends…"

Emily looked back over her shoulder with a questioning look.

"Depends…are you going to talk to me or am I going to have to pull everything out of you like normal?" There wasn't a response. "I'll take wine if I'm pulling and coffee if we are talking." Emily poured the woman a cup of coffee but then a glass of wine and set both in front of her. She then took her own wine to the couch and sat down. JJ took a deep breath and pulled the envelope from the flowers and picked up her wine and walked over and sat down beside Emily.

"Okay Prentiss…" she said before taking a sip of the wine then sitting it on the coffee table. She looked at the woman who wasn't budging and pulled the card out of the envelope laying it on her lap so she could empty the keys out in her hand. She held them up for Emily to see, "I believe these are to your hand cuffs." She said hoping to get some kind of response from the stubborn woman.

Emily's eyes widen as she took the keys and the card off of JJ's lap. She opened the card and read it. "Damn it Smitty I'm going to kill you." She whispered through gritted teeth.

"How did you know there were keys in this card," She looked up at JJ. "…and who else knows?"

"Now Em…do not get angry…"

"JJ…" She said in an answer me tone.

"The whole team…"

"Damn…How do they know…" she looked at JJ's face and said, "Garcia?"

"Yes…but she was just…"

"She was just being noisy and read my card."

"Yes"

"Great…Now I really have…" She said getting up and pouring herself more wine.

"Em…why have you asked for a transfer?" JJ asked after hearing the partial statement.

Emily turned and looked at her, "I guess nothing is considered private anymore?"

"That's not an answer."

"It's none of your business and I think I want you to leave." She said pointing at the door.

JJ brought her hands up and rubbed her face in frustration at how the conversation had turned. Standing up she went towards Emily, "This is not going well at all."

"You think?" Emily said sarcastically tilting her head.

"I think…" JJ said blowing out the breath she was holding. "I think we really need to talk about some things that you probably have locked away in a box but we have to talk about them because I do not want you to leave." They stood there looking at each other for several moments with neither one knowing where to go from the last statement. Finally Emily closed her eyes, "What do you want Jennifer?"

JJ wasn't expecting that question nor was she expecting the bolt of desire that ran through her body when Emily used her proper first name. She moved closer and caught the woman's lips with her own. Emily opened her eyes and pulled back being surprised at the kiss. "What are you doing?"

"I have no clue other than I want to kiss you right now."

"Jennifer…" Emily whispered and closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh. She could tell the woman was fighting within herself and decided to put a little distance between them so they could talk even though all she wanted to do was taste the velvet lips before her again. "Will you please talk to me?"

"About what exactly…you already know I'm gay. Thanks to Smitty you probably think I'm also into bondage...which by the way is so far from the truth. You already know I'm thinking about transferring. What else is there?" She asked sitting down on the couch.

JJ came and sat with space between them beside her. "Em… the gay part was a shock but I think you wanted it to be because you are tired of our preconceived ideas of your personal life. You wanted to basically shut us up. I get that…but why transfer now. None of us thinks any less of you for being gay and I think the guys are in awe of you and the hand cuff thing." Emily rubbed her eyes as she laughed at the last comment. "I bet they are."

"That's not an answer. Why reveal all this now? What happened on the last case? Please…Talk to me…"

Emily looked up into concerned eyes…taking a deep breath she started, "When I was 16 I fell in love with Linda. We were crazy infatuated with each other. We wrote notes at night to one another and stuck them into each other's lockers the next day. Then one day a note she wrote me fell out where she didn't push it in good and one of the jocks found it and read it to everyone he could find. I was out of town with mother and didn't find out about it until a week later.

Her father was called to school after she was in tears from the bulling and scrutiny of the whole high school. By the time I had returned home she was gone. Her father had sent her off to be rehabilitated into liking men and I wasn't allowed to know where she was. Mother took me out of that school and put me into another one and threatened my life if I ever pulled another stunt of falling for a girl…which worked until college. Then she threatened my trust funds and family name. Now we just do not talk about it as long as I'm not openly gay.

Anyway…Linda got a letter out to me through a guy friend of ours. The place was horrible and she didn't want to change so she told me she loved me and to be true to what I was and not to mourn her she was going to be free one way or another. I got the letter a week after learning of her suicide. I was so angry at the world and at her for not being strong enough. I totally got it though after dealing with my own mother and the kids at the high school when I went back for my personal stuff. She had endured hell just because she loved me."

They sat there with tears running down both their faces. "Did the girl in California remind you of Linda?"

"Yes and no…she didn't look like her but her circumstances were similar. That is why I asked Hotch not to send her back to her uncle's house I knew something bad was going to happen but it was out of my hands."

"Em…you can't blame yourself for that."

"No…but I blame myself for not having the courage as a grown woman to live my life as I am. If we do not stand up as adults then we leave the Linda's and Heather's to suffer and think that death is the only answer to ignorance and prejudices…the only way to be free with what they feel. I hate feeling powerless…I may have been able to stop her from hanging herself. I couldn't have stopped Linda but I had a chance with Heather."

"Stop beating yourself up... I know how the "what if's" feel like. My sister killed herself when I was eleven and there wasn't a note or anything that said why and my whole family has beaten themselves up thinking it was their fault in some way."

"Jennifer you were just eleven how could you have been anyway responsible?"

"Not seeing the signs or being nicer to her. The same unfounded reasons that you are blaming yourself…you just loved Linda. Heather wasn't under your responsibility either. No part of their deaths is your fault," she said moving closer and pulled the crying woman into her arms. She held her until the sobs and pain of years of guilt flowed out and left an emptied body in her arms. "Please don't transfer Em… We need you… I need you." She whispered into the woman's ear she was holding.

Emily was so spent she just pulled JJ in tighter as a way of answering the moment. JJ sensed that the woman couldn't speak and just slowly fell back on the couch taking her with her as they held each other and eventually fell asleep in the embrace they both needed.

Chapter Six

The sun peaked in the window around 6 am. JJ slowly opened her eyes and found Emily still asleep on top of her. She tightened her arms around the warmth of the woman. She thought about the conversation of the night before. She realized they had talked the past out but nothing had been settled on Emily's possible transfer or her own feelings. It felt so right having the weight of this woman on top of her. The scent of Emily's shampoo caused an atmosphere of pure desire to manifest all around her. How did she miss her feelings all this time?She was pulled out of her pondering as Emily breathed in deeply and opened her eyes. She gave her a few moments to focus where she was before saying, "Good morning."

Emily raised her head and looked at JJ, "Good morning." She slowly tried to get up but JJ pulled her tighter to herself.

"Stay"

Emily looked up again into sincere eyes and complied. "What is this Jennifer?"

"What do you mean?"

"The kisses, the "I need you", and this."

"I do not know Em… honestly. All I know is this just feels right." She admitted out loud for the first time.

"You have a boyfriend…" She lifted total up and off of JJ, "…that you should be with right now shouldn't you?"

JJ looked up at the standing woman, "No…he is in New Orleans and my place is right here at the moment." She said standing up and trying to embrace Emily who pulled away and went into the kitchen.

"What is it Emily? Why won't you respond to me? You kissed me back on Friday why not now?"

"Jennifer…" she started as she went to make coffee and place some distance between them, "…the truth?"

"Yes I want the truth."

"The truth is because I love you."

"You aren't responding to me because you love me?"

"No…because I'm in love with you."

"Oh…" she said as the weight of the statement sunk in.

"Yeah…"oh"… I can't respond back on a whim because it's real for me." She said and turned her back starting the coffee to brewing. Not wanting to see the other woman's face.

"Em…" JJ said coming up behind her and sliding her arms around the woman's waist and pulling her into a tight hug. "This doesn't feel like a whim to me. I do not know what it is but whim is not the word. I have never felt this before for anyone male or female. You say my name and I watch the sounds come off your lips and it sends electricity all over my body. I know I love you as a friend but this is different and maybe I have felt it all along but had a wall up thinking we were both straight. I just do not know…but one thing is for sure I'm attracted to you. I want to know where this leads…don't you." She said kissing the side of Emily's neck causing the woman to tilt her head giving better access.

"Oh God I do…I so do… but we need to take it slow." She said gently pulling away from JJ causing a grunt of frustration from her.

"Why?"

"I've been in this life for a long while now and it is way different than the straight world Jennifer. Plus we need to talk more right now than our hormones do. There is a lot at stake. We need to think about everything and not just this moment. There's your boyfriend… and work…" she lost train of thought as JJ came up behind her again and found the same spot on her neck.

She kissed, "Will…I'll deal with after Christmas and Hotch already has seen us kiss and he isn't mad." She said as she now sucked where she had been kissing.

Emily moaned at the feeling of a warm mouth on her plus point. "Jennifer…" The sound of her name made JJ suck harder and run her hands up the back of Emily's sweat shirt. She had to feel skin knowing it would be soft and warm. "I'm having a hard time resisting you Jennifer."

"Good…give up and we both will be happy," was mumbled into Emily's neck.

All resistance was over when JJ brought her warm hands to the front of Emily and caught breast in her palms. That seemed to turn the switch on in Emily who pulled back some causing JJ to lift her head in time for her lips to be caught in a passionate kiss. A kiss that gave all the pent up emotions of desire left dormant in one of Emily's compartments a route of escape. JJ's knees almost buckled from the amount of feelings flowing from the other woman. She slid her arms back around Emily anchoring herself as the kiss seemed to intensify. They both were on fire for each other. Shirts were quickly removed in between deep longing kisses. JJ couldn't kiss enough, touch enough, or be handled enough to satisfy the yearning her body was experiencing. "Em…" was panted out as she tried to convey the need to sit, "…I need to …" she couldn't finish as Emily's hands caught her breast and was slowly kneading them.

"Oh God couch…" was the best she could get out.

Emily stopped and looked at her, "Are you sure?"

"Yes…Please."

"Then let's go upstairs."

A thought ran across JJ mind and she simply couldn't resist it, "Will you need your hand cuff keys?"

"What?"

"I'm kidding…" She said laughing.

"JJ…Nothing happened between Smitty and me this weekend."

JJ looked at her like "really."

"Honest…After you kissed me I couldn't. It really pissed her off too that's why she took my keys to get back at me. Women can be rough sometimes…like when their date kisses someone else especially when it stops their planned fun."

JJ was laughing, "Go figure…Why would that cause someone to get angry." She said rolling her eyes.

"Hey if I remember correctly I was getting sarcasm from you on Friday because of Smitty."

"True…so have you learned anything from that experience?"

"I won't be dating anyone but a hot blonde who tends to be possessive and has a jealous streak."

"Getting closer "Clark"

Emily smiled, "…Ouch… I guess that includes an Indian Princess who likes hand cuffs." She said as JJ was backing her up towards the stairs.

"Bingo" JJ said as she took Emily's hand and led her up the stairs and into the bedroom.

They made it to Emily's bedroom before JJ encircled her again with her arms. She just couldn't keep her hands off the woman. She kissed her and wondered where all the boldness was coming from. Emily let the young woman take the lead since she didn't seem willing to relinquish or needed any help. JJ hands returned to Emily's breast as a slight moan escaped from deep within her. "You are so soft, warm, and…" She was cut off by Emily caressing her own breast. "Mmm…" was sounded out into the air. JJ arched into the touch and then shivered as she realized the same feelings were flowing through Emily. Recovering some she had another epiphany, "I want to make her feel it all…I want to make love to her." The thought froze her.

"Jennifer… we can stop. I'm sorry. God I knew…" Emily was cut off when lips crashed against hers. JJ moved them towards the bed.

"I want to make love to you Em. I want to give you every feeling that you cause to explode in me." She said as she brushed hair back off of Emily's face. "I have never felt this alive or wanted to give to someone as I do right now." She looked into Emily's eyes and saw the start of unshed tears. "You'll have to guide me though. I have never done this before."

Emily smiled, "You've done a great job so far. Just be you and it will come to you. It won't take much to push me over at this point because I'm so on fire for you right now." She said taking JJ's hand and slid it down her sweats to feel the sure signs of want that was already pooling waiting release. JJ's eyes rolled back as she felt the warmth. She reopened them and looked into the depths of black eyes of desire. "How could I have missed this?" She thought still wondering about her ignorance of emotions. She pulled Emily's sweats off then discarded the rest of her own clothes. Emily sat on the bed still allowing the inexperienced woman to have the lead. She lay back on her pillows as JJ crawled on top of her. So many thoughts swirled in her mind seemingly all at once. "So soft…she has so much love in her eyes for me…I do love her…How could…this be wrong… what is peoples' problem…god she feels amazing."

"What are you thinking Jennifer?"

"OH…that voice calling my name…god I never want it to stop." She looked at Emily, "I was thinking if this is sinning then I'll have to go to confession every day."

"You are not Catholic."

"Then I'll go with you."

Emily laughed and pulled the woman into an embrace, "I do love you Jennifer."

"I love you too and now I'm going to try and show you just how much." She said capturing Emily's lips in a kiss that she quickly deepened. Gaining courage to explore, JJ moved back to where the warm pools were waiting her touch. Pulling back and looking at Emily, "May I…" She couldn't finish. Emily understanding the request, "You can do what you feel I will enjoy." Then she lent up and kissed the woman conveying the truth in the statement. JJ began exploring the secrets of loving Emily. She watched as Emily's eyes rolled back and her hands clutched the sheets as she entered the woman for the first time. "God I want to make her feel good." She thought. She started a rhythm with her fingers, "Em…Guide me… I want to make you feel good.

Emily was building "Don't stop your fingers love but curl up when you pull out and circle your thumb over…" She never got to finish as JJ got the message and she arched up into the mini explosions building into the massive one being promised. JJ was in total awe of all the feelings and sounds of making love to Emily entailed…of her lover clenching around her fingers and the look of ecstasy on her face. Then the sweetest sound she ever heard, "Jennifer…" was spoken as Emily totally fell apart around her fingers as she held her until the spasms stopped.

"You sure you never have done this before?" Emily said regaining her breath.

"I promise not even once."

"Then you are just a natural I guess." She said as she flipped the woman onto her back, "My turn now that is if I'm allowed?"

"By all means," JJ said with a sultry smile.

Emily kissed the woman that she had kissed a thousand times in her dreams. "How can this be happening?" She thought, "Shut up Prentiss just enjoy was the answer her heart gave her mind."

JJ was on over load of emotions but her mind logged every feeling thinking "I gave that to her too. This is what she felt." She couldn't believe how intense making love to Emily was. She never had anything like this with a man. The last thought she had before thoughts refused to come together was "Emily wants to give this to me like I wanted to give to her." Explosions fired in her body causing her to fly away yet she felt warm arms holding her to the earth so she wouldn't float away. She heard loving worlds of "You are so beautiful" as she drifted back to her body. She opened her eyes into the most beautiful smile above her.

"Hello gorgeous."

"Hello… she said as she lent up and pulled Emily into a fierce kiss. They broke apart for air and JJ couldn't hold back the tears anymore. Emily held her. "Shhh…I got you."

"Em…I believe I'm in love with you too. It scares me but I'm not going to run. I believe I have loved you from the beginning. What do we do now?"

"We go slowly."

"I don't want to…I want to shout I love Emily from the roof of this building. I have never in my life felt anything as wonderful as this."

"I know… I feel it too but the world doesn't get it."

"Screw them… I love you not them."

Emily laughed, "Okay Clark."

"Oh you didn't just go there."

"No…not that way… I mean you want to clear buildings in a single bound."

"That's how you felt about Smitty."

"No…that's how I felt about telling the world I loved women."

"I get that. Then what do we do now?"

"The world is a cruel place where the love between the same sex is frowned upon. Yes there have been many strides forward but I guarantee you when you tell someone you have a new girlfriend their reaction will be very different than if you tell them you have a new boyfriend."

"That's just wrong."

"I agree but for now let's go down stairs and make black bean soup and spend today basking in our love for each other, make love again, then go to Rossi's tomorrow for Christmas dinner and just enjoy the wonderfulness of us before mud is thrown on our new car."

"That's right today is Christmas Eve."

"It is."

"You really think people will react to us differently?"

"Yes...even our friends. Some on a small scale while others will turn their backs on us."

"I hope not because it's dumb."

"I know but they are entitled to their opinions."

"You are right." She stopped and looked at Emily puzzled, "Em…who has black bean soup on Christmas Eve," she asked looking confused.

"I was wondering when you were going to ask that. It's comfort food for me and I wasn't expecting my dream girl for the holidays." She said smiling and kissing the woman in her arms. They forgot about the soup until an hour and a shower later.

Chapter Seven

They arrived at Rossi's right at 6 pm. They had to stop at JJ's place to get gifts and let her change clothes since she had been at Emily's for the last two nights. Hotch noticed the two had drove in together but hadn't mentioned the fact. They brought in all the gifts and placed them under the tree. Emily had to go back out to get the bottle of whiskey she had brought for Rossi. She came in and met JJ in the doorway as the woman was about to enter the dinner room area.

"Awe would you look at that." Morgan said smiling looking at Emily and JJ.

They stopped and looked at each other then back at the others gathered in the dinning room confused. He pointed above their heads at the mistletoe strategically hanging above their heads. Emily looked at JJ and shook her head at their friends antics. JJ looked back at her and smiled letting the woman know it was okay so she stepped forward and gave her a simple peck on the cheek.

JJ looked at Morgan and gave him a wink and caught Emily in her arms and dipped her and gave her a searing kiss. When the whistles and wolf calls died she let Emily up who whispered in her ear, "minx." JJ laughed as Emily continued into the room and gave Rossi the bottle of whiskey that was delivered from her friend Otto's distillery trying to play off the kiss as an act.

"This is from the place you and Reid went to a few weeks back isn't it?" he asked looking the bottle over.

"Yes and it's very good. Special company only." She said letting him know it was very expensive.

"Well that leaves this crowed out." He said laughing and getting glasses for anyone who wanted to taste it.

JJ proceeded over to sit by Hotch who bent towards her ear and in a voice that only she could hear, "I take it that we will be discussing being professional on Monday."

She looked at him and smiled as a way of answering.

"Good...Very nicely done with the mistletoe... everyone thinks you two were joking."

She smiled again but caught Pen's eyes on her and thought, "Not everyone." but she didn't say anything.

Emily came and sat down beside her knowing if she sat across from the woman that all the profilers in the room would know they were together with the sultry looks they couldn't help giving each other started. She also liked letting her leg touch the blondes under the table with an occasional hand squeeze.

"I'm glad to see that your feeling better." Garcia decided to test the waters.

"Thank you Pen...I am. I think I got a bug but with a pot of soup and rest I am feeling much better."

The tech analyst smiled then looked at JJ who was busy keeping her mouth full so she couldn't give anything away by her facial expressions.

"Did Smitty get home okay?" Hotch asked with the whole table looking at him like they couldn't believe he asked that after all the "leave Emily alone" speeches.

"Yes she did."

"Those were some mighty beautiful roses she sent you." Rossi said keeping up the conversation.

"Yes they were it was nice seeing her again and very considerate of JJ to bring them to me." Emily said trying to keep her answers to the point knowing it was killing everyone but JJ and maybe Hotch to know about the hand cuff keys. JJ cringed inside knowing that Pen now truly knew something was up since she had told her that Hotch was going to take them. She looked up and saw eyes glaring at her and knew it was going to hit the fan.

"Did she give you the card with them?" Pen was beyond caring at this point. She wanted to know.

"Garcia." Hotch finally spoke up.

"Yes...Pen I got my card and my hand cuff keys back. Women can't live with them or without them especially when they get into your stuff." She said taking her wine glass and drinking a big gulp then smiled at the guys at the table, "Right guys?" She said keeping the conversation clean since Jack was there with Hotch. They all busted out laughing and moved on to other subjects. JJ was so proud of Emily for how she handled the hand cuff issue. She knew it was really killing the woman to have her personal life under scrutiny. The rest of the dinner went without tension and everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves. When it came time for the table to be cleared Garcia volunteered her and JJ's services so she could talk to the woman alone. The rest of the team went into the other room except Emily who offered to help as well.

"Go on Em...JJ and I have this." She said making sure she could have a private conversation with her best friend.

"Well if your sure. I'm going to go and check on Jack since he wanted to show me his new video game."

"Go on Em we have this." JJ said and rolled her eyes and smiled.

Pen started gathering up dirty dishes and waited till Emily left before she started in on her best friend, "Okay Missy you took Emily the flowers?"

"Hold on a minute there Pen."

"Do not "hold on me" lamb chop. You went to Emily's without me and while I'm on it that kiss in there looked for real not acting like you both tried to play it off as. Have you both woken up and smelt the coffee?"

"Shhh...Pen. I'll tell you in the kitchen. Let's just clear the table first." They cleared all the dishes and were rinsing them for the dishwasher when Pen finally couldn't stand it anymore. "Okay JJ spill." She took a moment and tried to figure out where to begin. "Friday night at the ball I kissed Emily and Hotch saw us."

"Shut the front door...you didn't."

"But I did and it was amazing and confusing all in one. I wasn't sure of what was going on so I just passed it off as a fleeting experiment."

"What made you kiss her?"

"Hotch had asked me to keep an eye on her so she wouldn't upset the Ambassador. When Emily and Smitty started kissing while dancing Rossi and I went and broke it up by switching dance partners. Then he kidnapped her I guess to help keep things under control. I said something sarcastic and she replied "at least I was still honest with her." That bothered me so I took her out to talk on the patio and while she was talking she called me "Jennifer" and how she said it was just so...I don't know. All I wanted to do after that was kiss her."

"Wow"

"Yeah...wow."

"That still doesn't explain the flowers."

"I'm getting there. Hotch left me alone about it until Tuesday. Seems Emily was taken back by the kiss somewhat and asked for a transfer."

"What?"

JJ held up a finger, "Hold on...he suggested I take the roses over to her and talk and we are to have a meeting on Monday. So I did and Emily was being all Prentissy about it all until I pulled out the hand cuff keys. Which by the way she knows you read her card and that the whole team knows. I have a feeling she isn't going to let that one go."

"Oh crap." Pen said looking nervous.

"Well...it turns out nothing happened between them and Smitty took the keys because she was mad at Emily for kissing me back."

"OOO a woman scorned. Okay what about the kissy face in there?"

"We talked about the case in California and we both realized we had lost someone important to us by suicide and we cried and held each other and fell asleep on her couch. The next morning she tried to go back to being Prentiss but I was hooked on her being Emily and we have spent the last few hours together talking."

"Talking?"

"Yes talking and maybe a little kissing." She said with a smile.

"What about Will?"

"I'm going to break it off. Pen I have never felt so loved by someone or wanted to love someone as I do her."

"What about work?"

"I don't have a clue. Emily keeps telling me that people will act differently towards me because she is a woman. She was afraid of how the team would react to her. That's why she kept it a secret until she couldn't stand us trying to fix her up on dates with men anymore."

"Do you think she will transfer?"

"No... I have no plans of transferring if I can help it." Emily said as she walked in and slid her arms around JJ's waist.

"Emily!" They both said.

"How long have you been in here?" JJ asked worriedly.

"Not long but the team has heard the whole conversation thanks to Rossi's handy dandy intercom system above your heads." She said pointing up to what looked like a baby monitor. "I heard most of it until I turned it off so Jack couldn't hear."

JJ looked mortified at Emily, "I am so sorry."

"Shhh... it's okay. They had to know sometime and the fact that you told Pen that you loved me was worth it." She said as she moved in and kissed the woman until they heard clapping and whistles coming back over the intercom. "Come on I believe our public awaits."

They walked into the living room where everyone was waiting to open gifts. The women were greeted with hugs and congratulations and Hotch told them that as long as they kept everything professional there was no reason to say anything else to anyone. Rossi went and got drinks for everyone to toast the new couple. Emily asked if she could make it and he smiled and held his hand out like she had the floor.

"I guess this Christmas has been about confessions. I have another one...I am the luckiest woman in the world because not only have I found love but I have found my true family in you all. So here's to Christmas confessions." They all lifted their glasses in agreement while JJ hugged Emily to her side smiling as they all said, "To Christmas confessions" and drank.

 **Thank you for reading.**


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